#45 – When Few Words Do Trick

I feel like Kevin in meetings sometimes.

Those dull meeting rooms where the boss and 1 or 2 really keen employees are throwing around ideas, arguing, joking, gesturing at a PowerPoint.

Those meetings where I leave without saying a word. I know I’m not the only one.

You know how in jazz music, it’s about listening to the notes they’re not playing? Here are some ways to hear what the people aren’t saying:

If they look deep in thought…

..they’re probably formulating an idea and it’s not fully ready, or they don’t have the confidence to say it yet. Try prompting them to speak and listen intently.

If they look overwhelmed or anxious…

..they might be new or unsure about what’s going on. It might be the tip of the iceberg: if one person is lost there are likely more who don’t understand the task. Take a moment in the meeting to go over the task, or check in with them afterward.

Or worse, they might want to speak but don’t feel psychologically safe enough to do so. Is the leader suppressing opinions? Is the environment overly negative with more beef than an Argentine steakhouse? It might be time to brush off your dispute resolution skills.

If they’re bored and checking the cricket scores…

..you might be spending too much time in meetings. It’s easy to lose interest when the meetings go on and on and on and on and on an- well you get the idea.

It means anyone speaking is just droning on and nothing important or interesting is getting done. It’s a waste of time, so you may as well be getting a manicure or watching the cricket.

So what can we do?

Silent meetings.

At Amazon, meetings start with 30 minutes of silence for everyone to read the memo. Everyone has to concentrate, and be (literally) on the same page until it’s time to discuss.

Square takes it one step further and uses a Google Doc. Everyone uses the comment feature to ask and answer questions. No one gets talked over, everyone has the same level of voice, and it allows people who normally get talked over to speak their minds.

Everyone is focused, equal and valued.

So I don’t know if few words do trick (I write extra words in my spare time so probably not).

But silence is definitely golden.

Next week: Don’t forget your lunchbox